I was busy with work, travel, and hobbies, and I always had partners that never wanted a family. Life Without Baby: How did you make the decision to be childfree?Įllen Walker: I never spent a lot of time thinking about motherhood. Ellen is childfree by choice, and even though I am childfree by chance, we had plenty to talk about on the subjects of friendship and community, the drive for motherhood, and what to do when life doesn’t go as planned. Ellen Walker, author of Complete Without Kids: An Insider’s Guide to Childfree Living by Choice or by Chance. Author Sue Lick described one man’s experience with “childlessness” as a difficult compromise to be with his infertile partner.Last week I had the pleasure of interviewing Dr. These men likely feel a grief similar to that felt by women who were unable to become mothers despite yearning to do so. They look at their peers who are fathers with envy, wishing that they too could have had this role in life. Perhaps their partners were infertile or they never married due to shyness or other barriers to meeting a mate.
They would have loved to be fathers, but they simply couldn’t make it happen. And then there are the childfree by circumstance guys. If they are in a relationship, it’s with someone who shares their view and also has chosen a life without kids. Others are truly childfree by choice, consciously deciding to not have kids due to lifestyle considerations or values.
They are classic childfree by happenstance individuals. As I describe in my book, Complete Without Kids, some have simply never met the right partner with whom to create a family, and their ambivalence about this keeps them from actively seeking it. The reality is that men who don’t have kids are as varied as their female counterparts.
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